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Welcome To My World
Welcome to my world - Words i like to live by
I've learned that when chaos strikes in life, whether it's losing your car in the parking lot or your keys in the house, (let's not mention losing your kid in the mall), we are given a choice to either sink into despair or don our metaphorical clown noses & find a silly side amidst all the havoc.
After all, life should be all about cookies: calories ignored, crumbs celebrated. As long as there are enough to share it can be sweet. If you find your cookie jar empty, that would be "BITTER"sweet and you would need to phone a friend—stat! Ultimately everyone one deserves a half-full cookie jar at the very minimum.
Truth is, life doesn’t always hand you the world’s greatest cup of warm tea to go with that cookie though. Sometimes it serves the world’s worst—burnt diner coffee, lukewarm in a chipped mug, by some guy named Vinny. But it’s what you toss in that flips the script. Sugar, cream, or a laugh—so stir it up! And don’t confuse that with "stirring the pot." That can be a whole chapter on its own. Maybe it’ll be. Whatcha think? You’ll just have to wait and see, I guess.
Laundry and Floss
What does a pile of laundry and flossing have in common?
Read a little here to find out the answer.
"Just the other day, I had a real life - smack me in the face like a wet towel moment.
I was attempting to tackle the mountain of laundry that had somehow developed into its own ecosystem on my bed. Honestly, I half-expected David Attenborough to narrate, 'And here we are observing the rare sock colony, thriving in its natural habitat.'
It was like climbing Mount Everest without the ropes. My eyes were peering down at the abyss of wrinkled clothes, some still with noticeable yet unwanted questionable stains.
As I grunted and kicked a sock that was on the floor, I sighed, preparing for a serious showdown between me and the laundry, complete with old western music playing in my head..."
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Let's Be Frank
Let's Be Frank:
Or Jimmy, Sal, Walter -- You pick, but I'm sticking with Frank here!
This memoir is colloquial charm with superlative laughs—straight outta Jersey.
It's the real me—stuffed with words some folks might call typos or mispronunciations. Nah, just lil’ ole me shootin’ the breeze (I promised my Ma that I wouldn't curse a lot but feel free to change the word "breeze" into something more fitting) over a cup o’ joe, y’all.
Colloquial… now that’s a ten-dollar word, huh? Makes me sound super-duper brainy, doesn’t it? Oh, the irony! Come on—say it with me: col·lo·qui·al. Next time you’re sittin’ in a Jersey diner, chewin’ the fat, and talkin’ louder than the jukebox, drop it in. Fuhgeddaboudit—you’ll feel whip smart, like you just out-talked the whole booth.
My bad, to my oh so patient editors, for puttin’ you through all the extra work and understanding me for who I am. This one’s a real hair-puller, ain’t it? Sorry for bustin’ your chops!
Eggshells
On a Serious Note:
Or is it?
I spent decades saying one thing while secretly meaning another, all to avoid confrontation. Turning a blind eye, so to speak.
I like to think of myself as the Captain of Subtext, navigating the seas of double meaning. My secret power is tossing out words that sound straightforward but carry a wink from the not-so-blind eye, leaving another wondering.
Dive into my memories and you’ll find some uncomfortable bits of my screwy life baked right in—embracing every hidden twist and turn, ducking every lemon thrown my way, raising an eyebrow from time to time (figuratively speaking, since I literally cannot do that—I’ve tried for years), and learning from each moment while feeling empowered by these amusing phenomena.
Think pizza: with thin crust, the pepperoni is on display. With deep dish, you’ve got to dig through sauce and cheese to uncover the truth—or the pepperoni, in this case.
My life? Definitely deep dish—messy, layered, and “worth a fork” (and I know you know what I mean). Either way, I’m serving it up hot, with a few winks, a side of sarcasm, stack of pancakes and bacon from my favorite Jersey diner to round off this messy meal (life)!
In a Nutshell
In a Nutshell:
Thank you!
Shout‑out to everyone I’ve encountered in my life. There really should be an us in memoir—otherwise I’d only have one page, half empty… or rather, half full. Full of what, you might ask? Stay tuned.
I appreciate you all for your unstoppable, unconditional love and support—on earth and beyond.
Your strength helps me through the toughest days and nights, and your wisdom and advice are bountiful. Of course, they only work if I choose to listen and agree with your suggestions. As some of you know, I’m not always good at that—but who really is? Does a chef like being told his potatoes need more thyme? Does a driver enjoy a back‑seat driver? Does a fashionista like being told their outfit looks like crap? The answer to all is probably: no. Yet if we take a moment to listen, breathe, understand, and reflect, we eventually get it. So again, thank you!
Oh, and let’s not forget my tremendous gratitude to those who knowingly tossed rough lessons my way—forcing me to dig deep and ask myself, “WTF have you been thinking and doing all these years, Jo, and why?”
I don’t need to list names. You all know who you are, so give yourselves a pat on the back—no matter which category you fall in. Job well done!